Uh, oh, we’re in trouble, something’s come along
And it’s burst our bubble, yeah, yeah.

Our bubble had exploded & we were in serious trouble.

The border crossing out of Turkmenistan was easy enough. We were getting used to the formalities by now & perhaps a little complacent. Through all our planning we believed Turkmenistan would be one of the hardest borders we would have to cross. Not for one moment did we envisage problems in Uzbekistan.

Uzbekistan has fairly strict rules about what items you can temporarily import with you, medicines being one of them. We had done our research in the early stages of our planning during 2014 & thought we were aware of items we may have trouble with. Through the border crossings to date we had none or little trouble. Yes, we had a few who had tried it on wanting bribes or gifts but they didn’t get very far. Crossing into Uzbekistan, our luck ran out.

When we first crossed over into the border crossing area we had to go to an area & be seen by a doctor. The doctor took our temperature & asked us if we were well. He also asked us to fill in a declaration form confirming we had not visited any areas which the Uzbekistan’s deem a risk area. This was the first time we had been asked to see a doctor when crossing into a Country. We were then directed to the main building to start the entry process.

We entered the building, not really knowing where to go. There were some local women crossing from Turkmenistan to Uzbekistan on foot. They appeared to be as bewildered as us walking backwards & forwards through the scanners. Soon, we were allowed through & asked to complete the standard declaration forms. The guard on duty was slightly impatient & kept walking out of his office to see if we had completed the forms. His patience ran out after 10 minutes & he turned the page over & pointed to us to sign at the bottom. Without thinking, or even reading the back of the declaration form we both signed our incomplete forms.

As we stepped into the office, a border official immediately asked if we had any medicines to which we replied only paracetamol. She didn’t believe us & ordered us to go & collect our belongings from the car. John went to Minty & collected the first box of kit for inspection. I remained in the office with our passports whilst being questioned about where we had been, where we were going & what our plans were whilst visiting Uzbekistan. The questions then led to being told to hand over my phone for inspection. I duly did this but it was quickly handed back to me as it was locked. Due to the heat the fingerprint recognition wouldn’t work so I had to enter my passcode which they then wanted. I refused to give them this & managed to distract them by asking if they needed any other items to look at.

By now they had access to my phone & were looking at all my photo’s, video’s & emails, checking I did not have any material which is illegal in Uzbekistan. They became obsessed of my video’s & photo’s of the gates of hell & an intense 5 minutes of questioning followed. I was slightly taken aback, I didn’t expect this type of questioning for one moment. They had apparently never heard of the crater in Turkmenistan & thought it was a meteor landing; I had to explain it wasn’t. I was then asked how I knew about it; through books & the internet. I then had to get my digital copy of Lonely Planet’s Central Asia book to show them. They were then trying to send a copy of the video to themselves. For once I had done something right. Ihad turned off internet access & I hadn’t enable the feature to send photo’s via text so I was safe, they hadn’t yet worked out how to use an iPhone.

Meanwhile, John returned with some of our items from the car. They were being checked & scanned & put back in the tubs we were carrying everything in. John was then asked to move Minty so she could be checked along with the remainder of our items in the car. All seemed to be going well & it appeared we would be on our way within the next hour.

John left the office & moved Minty to the vehicle inspection area. I stayed, waiting for them to finish checking my phone. Soon they were finished so I went outside to join John with Minty.

Two military guards were going through the contents of Minty. They were nice guys & were merrily checking inside, even pulling out the viking hat & putting it on their heads. Next to the hat on the backseat was the drone.

They pulled the drone out of the car & were excited about it. They put it on Minty’s bonnet & were madly asking questions about it, laughing & asking their colleagues to come over. They had obviously never seen one before & were delighted to. They asked John to put the propellers on as they wanted to see it fly. To avoid what we thought would be any problems, John put the propellers on & they all walked over to a clearing the other side of the vehicle inspection area. What happened next shocked us & the military guys.

Out of nowhere, a border official appeared, shouting loudly. Everyone scarpered & the drone was taken out of John’s hands & disappeared with the official across the compound & back to the office. One of the military guards told John he was now in trouble. We stood there, not really knowing what to do. We put all the other items back into Minty & locked her. We walked back over to the office where our paperwork had been processed & the drone was sat on the desk in front of the lady who had bombarded me with questions a short time ago.

It was at this point we were told drone’s were not allowed into Uzbekistan.

We tried to reason with the guards but they were not prepared to listen to us at all. As we hadn’t completed the declaration forms the drone wasn’t listed. As we hadn’t read the back of the declaration form we were completely unaware they were banned items. Either way, it was our own doing.

In an attempt to leave without any more trouble we offered to destroy the drone. That wasn’t acceptable & they ordered John to collect all items which belonged to it. John returned with the controller & the battery charger. They then went back out to search Minty & retrieved the spare blades from the camera bag. As we hadn’t handed these over as well we were in even more trouble. To be honest we hadn’t even thought of the spare blades. By this time tensions were rising & we didn’t know how we would get out of the situation.

I stepped forward to remove the go-pro from the drone as it was a separate item. As I went near it the lady snatched it towards her like a child with a toy it doesn’t want to give it up. I couldn’t believe it. I moved closer again trying to explain the camera had nothing to do with the drone. She didn’t care. As far as the officials were concerned it was all one item & we had tried to enter the country with an illegal item.

Two hours earlier everything had been going well & we were nearly on our way. How quickly things can change. We waited in the office to hear our fate. Next someone was saying something about being in front of a judge in 3 days in court. Court!! We don’t want to go to prison or court in the UK never mind in Uzbekistan. At this point we didn’t have a clue what to do. All I heard was John saying something about not wanting to go to court & was there something we could do to not to. Off they went again.

They came back a while later & led us both to another building. We passed some other traveller’s on our way out of the office & they wished us good luck. They had seen most of the commotion from outside the office & they were being held outside whilst we were being dealt with.

Until now we hadn’t realised the magnitude of trouble we were in. The building was full of military personnel & customs officials. We followed the guards to a room down a long corridor which when we entered was full of more customs staff & military. The drone was sat on one of the desks & they were busy talking. On one of the PC screens we could see a picture of the drone. They had obviously just googled it & now they knew what it was. They carried on talking & occasionally asked us if we could speak Russian, which neither of us could. They then started to go over everything we had discussed in the office earlier. The only thing we could think of doing was keep repeating ourselves. We kept asking for a translator as we couldn’t understand some of what they were saying & they were unable to understand everything we said. Thoughts started to run through my mind that no-one knew we were there. Even if another rally team went through, they would have no idea where we were as they would only see Minty outside. Due to the nature of the countries we were travelling though, we had been off the grid for a few days. The only interaction with home had been on my birthday when I spoke to my Son two days earlier. Thinking that it would take a few days for people to realise something may have happened I decided to try & do something before we disappeared into a black hole. We were after all still being processed to go to prison & court.

Whilst the officials were adamant at pushing us as far as they could go I resorted to turning my phone on & data roaming. I googled the phone number of the British embassy in Uzbekistan & called. They were closed & my call was directed to the foreign office in the UK. I was immediately cutoff due to the weak signal so I redialed. I soon got through to someone & was explaining our situation. They took all my details & said if we got cutoff again they would call me back.

I was sat in the room with John & nine officials at this time. I wasn’t paying much attention to them, my focus was to find a way out of the situation. Apparently, whilst I was on the phone to the foreign office, John noticed how their attitude changed. One of the ladies in the room had heard me on the phone & even though she had said she couldn’t speak or understand English it was obvious she understood every word I was saying. The foreign office explained they were unable to get a translator to us as we were at a road border. If we could get a phone number for them to call back on they would provide one. I tried to ask for a phone number & they refused to give one, saying the phone in the office did not accept incoming calls. They were being difficult & we had no choice but to put up with it. We both kept asking whilst the foreign office were still on the phone. Eventually they gave us one. When they recited it, I questioned the number as it was too many digits but I was told it was correct. What could I do other than relay the number. The foreign office said they would get someone to call the number we had been given.

Suddenly, things changed. We were offered the opportunity to pay a fine & not go to court. We grabbed the opportunity & said yes. We had no idea what the fine was & we didn’t have that much cash on us but if it meant we could get out of where we were & on our way out of Uzbekistan we didn’t care. We just wanted to get to the next country as quickly as possible which was a shame.

The officials then tried to explain that if we wrote a statement about what happened they would let us on our way with a fine. One of the customs officials who spoke fairly good English started to tell John what to write. John started to write everything she was saying word for word but then tried to change some of the words & sentences given to correct English. She quickly shouted at John to correct what he had written & he responded with I am writing it grammatically correct. As another argument was about to ensue with us being told we don’t know English & John responding with we invented the language I rapidly stepped in & asked John to write it as it was said. In my mind I knew it was incorrect but if this ever went any further it was proof John hadn’t written the statement but it had been dictated. I wasn’t the only one who tried to calm the situation. One of the military guys either had enough of us being there or felt sorry for us. He started to use Google Translate to help get the statement written. He was probably the only helpful person to step into the room. He also became our cigarette supply.

Ten hours after we crossed over the border I was told to pay the fine. We still didn’t know how much it was & I expected it to be somewhere in the several hundred dollars region. I did not expect it to be $30. As I was ushered from counter to counter I asked if it was possible to have a copy of the statement John had written & all the paperwork completed. The answer was no. The longer the situation went on the more we thought we were being held so they could keep the drone. Our offer of destroying it & them insisting on keeping the go-pro & the drone with its accessories made everything seem more clear. The drone was now locked in a safe in the room we were being held in & we had no proof we were even there other than the phone call to the foreign office.

The ordeal was soon over. As soon as the fine was paid we were given our passports back, stamped & able to go into Uzbekistan.

After being at the border crossing for twelve hours we were on our way. In short;

• We spent 10 hours in a locked room packed full of military & customs officials
• We nearly went to an Uzbekistan prison & a court hearing was being planned sometime in the future
• John had to write a dictated statement
• We paid a $30 dollar fine
• We were never given copies of the statement or any paperwork
• The foreign office were unable to contact us on the phone number we were given
• We were now a drone & go-pro down.

We never had any intention of using the drone in Uzbekistan but at the end of the day, laws are laws & we learnt a very scary lesson. Check for updates before visiting any country. Relying on research done 10 months previously is not an answer & it won’t get you out of trouble. I do believe if I hadn’t called the foreign office the outcome may have been very different. Then again, if the drone hadn’t of drawn so much attention in the first place the incident may not have happened.

Its not often you get accused of being a spy!